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That hurt BBN, but it hurt worse to see you quit yet again.
September 4, 2016
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Dear Diary: Post So. Miss Loss

September 3rd, 2016

Dear Diary,

True optimism is difficult to break. It’s more flexible that you would ever realize, and stronger than you ever thought possible… until it breaks, that is. Now, the question remains, what do we do with broken optimism?

It is in my very DNA to always see the glass half full, to never give up, to never say die, and to always look on the sunny side. Even when things are grim, I find a silver lining and hold on tightly. Things always turn around, right?

I think tonight’s loss to Southern Miss may have broken me. No disrespect to the Golden Eagles. They were a worthy competitor and we knew they would be coming in. It’s not who we lost to. It’s how we lost. Thirty-four unanswered points is maddening. The offense that seemed unstoppable in the first half was absolutely nowhere to be found in the second half. The defense that held So. Miss to ten points in the first half allowed three times that plus some to slip by them in the second.  The Southern Mississippi Golden Eagles were not the problem. We were. We were the problem. I do not know where our problem came from. Heck, I don’t even know what exactly was the epicenter of the problem. But, I do know that it was us. Our issues. Our problems. Us, us, us.

I’d really just like to know what the heck happened? What flipped the switch? Were So. Miss’ halftime adjustments just that great? Were ours that bad? Did we even make adjustments? Where in the heck did Barker go? And Badet? And Juice? Where in the world did they go? To be honest, I ain’t even all that mad at our defense. Poor boys couldn’t get off the field.

So, here I sit perplexed, brokenhearted, and with zero optimism for the rest of the season. I’ve never been here before and I absolutely do not want to stay here.

Stoops says he’s sorry. I appreciate that. He says they’ll do better. The players echo his sentiments. I so want to believe them. For Pete’s sake, I yelled at Negative Nancy’s on Twitter tonight during the first half (post-crappy start, pre-self implosion). I called them “haters” and told them to “eat it.” But, they were right. All the things people say about Kentucky Football just might be true after all.

Photo: Andrew Bishop,

Photo: Andrew Bishop,

If there’s anyone out there with a shred of optimism left, I need them to come talk me off this ledge. I have no clue what to do with broken optimism. I’m surely in uncharted waters here.

But, for what it is worth, I’m not “done.” Even in my brokenness, I will straight up say that if someone can be “done,” they’re not really a fan. It part of the fan experience. Joy, pain, winning, losing, exhilaration, defeat; they’re all a part of fanaticism. So, no, I’m not done. I just don’t know how to be optimistic about UK Football anymore. I’ll watch, I’ll cheer, and I’ll wish, but I just don’t know if I’ll be able to believe anymore. That, my dear diary, sucks.

I heard earlier this week that the biggest jump a team can make is between Week 1 and Week 2. I sure am hoping for a colossal leap. I’m tired of watching capable UK Football teams fail to finish. They are far, far too talented to collapse… especially this year.

To the Cats, I would say, “Jump! Leap! Take a running go and hurdle with all of your might. I need you to. I need to be a happy, hopeful, optimistic fan again. I need to believe in you again. I don’t know how to be an unhappy fan. Please don’t make me have to figure it out, especially this early in the season.”

Florida awaits us at The Swamp next week. *Gulp*

The season must go on.

Go Cats. Seriously. Please. Go.

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